I'm
sitting here thinking to myself that it's really just terribly bright
out there today and whoa, is it muggy. As I was scrolling through my
phone's weather app I could only nod my head that it indeed feels like a
thunderstorm is coming. I may love a storm but the humidity before
hand makes me feel miserable. In looking through the list of those
other cities I've added to my weather app, I see that London's having an
awesome 68 degrees and partly sunny kind of day. It's raining in Tokyo
and the temperature's at 68 degrees. But what's this? Phoenix is at 83
degrees only right now. And as I look at the 90 degree temperature
which it is supposed to hit today for NYC, I am reminded that oh yeah,
Summer is here. Immediately I start wishing for the glorious days of
Autumn, and the cold air to follow in Winter. I get to thinking about
snow. And then I remember that as much as I love the cooler weather of
Autumn and Winter in real life, I sure do despise an ice level in my
video games.
There's something so horrible about all that lack of control and the off-balance feeling when
you plant your virtual feet on the ground. Hey, come to think of it,
that's what I hate about Winter in real life too. Snow is cool but ice
is just awful. I lose my mind when I cannot put my feet on the ground
for fear that I'm just going to bite it. I tend to lose my mind too
when I am happily running through the grassy plains in my video games
only to stumble upon snow falling on a village. Why is that? I know
that slippery, frustrating times lie ahead in an ice cavern some where
and I immediately start to feel my blood boiling. I know my hands and
fingers are going to struggle as they go in every direction when I hold
the controller just to keep my face from planting on the ground.
Ice
villages might be quite charming for all the good Winter imagery that my
brain has been trained to recognize. Children throwing snowballs
(...instead of throwing heads?), snowmen may litter the landscape, and
fireplaces may look so cozy, warm and inviting. But then someone in the
village might mention you had to go get some *something something* in
the caverns to the north and you just know that pretty soon you're going
to slipping and sliding your way into oblivion. There's nothing worse
than seeing a chest right within reach and sliding past it because you
took a tumble that was designed just so you could fail over and over
again.
Then
there's the false sense of security that the music can bring you. Much
like the village before it, the music of an ice level might aptly
capture by way of sound that twinkling visual in the Wintry night sky.
There may be some bells, some harp strings, and a xylophone all there to
make you envision a peaceful, glittery drop of water dangling from that
very sharp icicle perched ever so dangerously above your head. Of
course, you know it's dangerous because you've had too many of those
almost crush you in previous gaming experiences, but the music is made
to cover up the recklessness lying in wait.
Let me not
even get started on the enemies you may encounter. You know the ones!
The ones that shoot ice or snowballs at you, or touch you and before you
know it, you're an ice pop. I always wanted to be strawberry flavoured
but I digress. No, usually you just end up some bland hero flavour
that cannot move for a few seconds. It's frustrating and insulting at
the same time!
So be
warned! When you come across that town that's covered in snow, enjoy
your time a little bit longer watching the kids in mittens at play.
Before you step out that broken down wooden gate, get well-equipped at
the local shop. Expect your body temperatures to dip when you scale
that icy mountain. Don't stand too long under any dripping icicles.
Keep out of the way of sliding penguins. And I'd tell you to mind your
step but the truth of it all is that you're going to slip on the ice no
matter what you do.
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